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Where are ‘Mezie Abia’ clowns? (1)

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ON February 15, 2014, one sycophantic group known as “Mezie Abia Organization” took a full- page advertorial in SATURDAY INDEPENDENT to pour tirades on the trio of Femi Adesina, Eric Osagie and my humble self for our different feed- back on the invidious visit of a few members of the Abia State chapter of the Peoples Democratic Party (PDP), led sheepishly, as usual, by former Governor Theodore Ahamefule Orji, to the erstwhile chair- man of the party, Alhaji Ahmadu Adamu Mu’azu, in Abuja. The sole mission was to clamour for the non-return of Dr. Orji Uzor Kalu to the party.
Also inevitably joined in the calumnious narrative was Kalu, of course. The horribly written advertorial, entitled “Abia PDP and the activities of Clown Writers,” was signed by a certain Hon. Uche Nwosu, President, Mezie Abia Organization (MAO). First free lesson: ‘clown’ is a noun/verb and its adjective is ‘clownish’—which should have ap- plied to the silly advertorial title.
Let us continue with the bizarre name of this outfit. Which Abia are they fixing? The one ruined by T. A. Orji for eight unbroken years? Whose mandate do they have to fix the 17th Century-like state? And what is the pedigree of this organization? Why did it employ illiterate English language to communicate blunders in the name of a rejoinder? Must you write if you do not have rudimentary writing skills and basic knowledge of the English language? Do children of outcasts not have access to vernacular (Igbo specifically), which should have been employed in attacking us?
The advertorial is a sheer advertisement of half-literacy and boyish illogic! So much for Nwosu’s self-inflicted public embarrassment as we go into the issues raised in that atrocious publica- tion.
Why should a purportedly honourable per- son indulge in a dishonourable act? Let’s take the specious declarations of MAO as much as space will allow and puncture them. “Actually, from the time it came into being till the year 2007, the state—Abia—was thoroughly abused, raped and abandoned to its appalling fate.” Since the creation of Abia State on August 27, 1991, all the past administrators and Kalu, tangentially, left the state in a dark corner!
The only person that brought light to the state is the immediate-past governor, accord- ing to MAO’s spurious testaments! What kind of collective dismissal of past leaders is this? Because you want to attack Kalu at the instance of his successor, you now berate all your principal’s predecessors in office! This is arrant non- sense and crass presumptuousness that border on overgeneralization rascality and blanket condemnation without any justificatory basis whatsoever.
The next extract from the MAO juvenility: “…how can any rational human regal (sic) a man that has sat on (sic) the saddle of governance for eight years without making any appreciable impact on its economic and social landscape. Orji Uzor Kalu, it will be recalled, was the governor of Abia State from May 27, 1999 to May 26, 2007.” If Kalu made an impact that was not appreciable, T. A. Orji’s phantom legacy—which will be the subject of another se- rial commencing in a fortnight—will evidence abject catastrophe without any impact at all, appreciable or not. The surfeit of grand deception, tomfoolery, lies and propaganda has finally given way to a stark reality of not abuse, rape and abandonment, but fatalistic and irredeemable destruction of Abia State.
Yet another MAO declaration: “No amount of hack and jaundiced writings would lacerate his personality, nor change the records of history (sic). Letting lose (sic) attack dogs to assault and harass a performing governor, in the person of Chief T. A. Orji (Ochendo Global)
(another comma) will only make him soar higher and higher.”
I pity Nwosu’s sub-education which will not allow him to comprehend the import of “hack and jaundiced writings.” How can any sane Nigerian in this country and in the Diaspora accuse the treble of Adesina, Osagie and Wabara of low quality writing? At the risk of immodesty, we are among the best in the world. The per- son must be suffering from imbecility. What does he mean by jaundiced writing? How can verifiable statements of fact be described as jaundiced writing? Only a demented person engages in name-calling (“attack dogs”). He claimed that Orji performed.
The only way to authenticate the yarn: let T. A. Orji walk, unaccompanied, in major streets in Abia and let us see whether he will not be stoned to death. Orji’s record in Abia is like a mirage and an obtuse gallery of pictures generated by adroit computer manipulators and used to publicly pool the wool over the eyes of some gullible Abians and indifferent Nigerians.
Let us take another extract from the MAO fabrication: “Some columnists of the (sic) Sun Newspapers have for some time now (sic) constituted themselves as (sic) attack dogs of (sic) Governor Orji and his government. At the last count, Eric Osagie, Ebere Wabara, Femi Adesina etc (sic) have (sic) taken up arms against an innocent man through their diabolical writ- ings, diatribes and invectives.” There is nothing diabolical about our writings as unsolicited documents and other interrogated sources of authentic and certified information at our dis- posal will open a can of worms in the weeks ahead.
Obviously, Nwosu does not know the meaning of “diatribes.” If he did, he ought to have understood that our critique of the maladministration in Abia will persist and we shall continue to inveigh against Orji on grounds of anger informed largely by his non-performance. No governorship successor has been as disrespectful as T. A. Orji to his predecessor! So, his mercenaries should not make allusions to heaping of “invectives” on him or similar terminologies in the unfolding combative circumstance.

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